Wedding Invitation Etiquette: Your Guide to Graceful Gestures 

Planning a wedding is a thrilling journey filled with countless decisions, from selecting the perfect wedding planner to choosing your dream dress. Among those decisions is the creation of an elegant and timeless wedding invitation, an art that requires attention to detail and knowledge of etiquette. To ensure that your invitations reflect the joy of your wedding, while respecting formal traditions, let’s brush up on the nuances of wedding invitation etiquette.  

1 – Timing, timing, timing

Sending out your invitations at the right time is important. Traditionally, you should mail wedding invitations six to eight weeks before your event. However, the average delivery time of the postal service has been increasing, so we recommend that you mail your invitations ever earlier: eight to 10 weeks out. And for destination weddings, or if many of your guests will be traveling from afar, consider sending them out even earlier: 10 to 12 weeks before your event.

2 – Clarity in language

The wording of your invitation sets the tone for the event. Traditionally, you begin with the hosts’ names (usually the bride’s parents), followed by the couple’s names and the date, time and location of the ceremony and reception.

3 – Attire

Your desired dress code is another important detail to include on your invitation, as providing this information gives your guests time to prepare for the event. There are numerous ways to word your attire expectations. We are happy to help with suggestions on how to best communicate the overall look you are wanting to achieve.

4 – Travel details

If guests are traveling from afar to your wedding, it is a kindness to include hotel and travel information on a separate card. Many couples choose to make a small card that directs guests to their website, which houses all pertinent travel information.

5 – Your guest list

When creating your guest list, consider the dynamics and relationships of those you wish to invite. If space and budget allow, it’s courteous to extend a plus-one to guests who are in committed relationships, whether they’re married, engaged or living together. However, if budget is a concern, it is acceptable to limit the plus-ones to spouses, fiancés or long-term partners.

6 – Addressing envelopes

Addressing envelopes can be a delicate task. Formal etiquette dictates the use of proper titles and last names when addressing guests – unless they have specifically requested otherwise. For married couples, never separate a man from his last name (e.g., Mr. and Mrs. Harry Smith). If a guest has a professional title or academic honor, include that as well.

7 – Tracking the responses

The response card, or reply card, should always include details on how and when to respond. If you are including a reply envelope, be sure it is printed with the return address and stamped! Some couples now prefer to track replies via an online responses. Be sure to diligently track your total guest count and communicate that number to all your vendor partners.

8 – Gifts

It is considered poor etiquette to mention gifts or registries in your wedding invitation. While it is customary for guests to bring gifts, the focus of the invitation should be on celebrating your union rather than soliciting presents. If guests inquire about gifts, it’s acceptable to direct them to your wedding website, where you can provide registry information discreetly. 

9 – Cultural awareness

If you and your partner are from different cultural backgrounds, or if you are hosting a multicultural wedding, be sensitive to the customs and traditions of both families. Thoughtfully incorporate elements from each culture into your invitation and ceremony to honor the diversity.

Happy wedding planning, everyone!